5 Signs You Might Be Resisting Change
Resistance can be sneaky and very subtle.
It rarely shows up in obvious forms. Instead, it shows up as being practical. Being realistic. Waiting for the right time. Needing more information. Having very good reasons why now isn't the moment. It doesn’t usually say no, it just says later.
It's one of the most convincing tricks the mind has. And most of us don't recognize resistance because it usually sounds so reasonable from the inside.
Here are five signs you might actually be resisting what’s next.
1. You keep getting ready to get ready.
The research phase has gone on for a while. The journaling about it. The conversations about it. The thinking about it from every possible angle.
There's always one more thing to figure out before you can actually begin. One more question to answer. One more piece of information to gather. One more person to talk to.
Preparation is real and necessary. But at some point preparation becomes its own destination. A way of staying close to the thing without actually doing it.
If you've been getting ready for a while now, that might be worth a closer look.
2. You're very busy with everything except the thing.
The thing that actually needs attention keeps getting pushed to later. There's always something more urgent, more practical, more immediately demanding.
The inbox. The obligations. The other people's needs. The maintenance of the current life.
And the thing sits there. Patient. Waiting. Getting bumped week after week.
Busyness is one of resistance's favorite disguises. It looks responsible. It looks like you're doing a lot. And underneath it, quietly, the thing you most need to do doesn't get done.
3. You notice yourself talking about it more than doing it.
You've told people about it. You've thought about what it would look like. You've imagined how it might go. You've maybe even gotten some encouragement and felt good about it for a day.
And then nothing happens.
There's a particular kind of energy that gets released in the talking about something that can actually substitute for the doing of it. The conversation gives a hit of forward motion without requiring any actual movement.
If the talking has been going on significantly longer than the doing, resistance is probably involved.
4. The reasons not to keep shifting.
Early on there was a specific reason why now wasn't the right time. Then that reason resolved and a new one appeared. Then that one resolved and another showed up.
The reasons themselves keep changing but the conclusion stays the same. Not yet. Not now. Not quite.
When the reasons are that flexible, they're usually not really the reasons. They're just whatever the resistance needs them to be at any given moment to keep things where they are.
5. You’re ignoring that deeper knowing.
Underneath the busyness and the preparation and the very reasonable reasons, there's often a part that knows. That has known for a while. That could tell you exactly what the next step is if you got quiet enough to hear it.
That part isn't confused. It's not waiting for more information. It knows.
The resistance isn't about not knowing what to do. It's about something else. Fear, maybe. The weight of what changes if you actually move. The loss of who you've been. The uncertainty of what comes next.
All of that is real. And none of it means you're not ready.
It just means you're human.
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Resistance isn't a character flaw. It's just the mind doing what the mind does to try and stay in control.
We usually can’t have total control and big change at the same time. So which one are you choosing in this moment?
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Andrew J. Assini (Drew) is a poet, guide, teacher, and fellow traveler who helps folks wake up through simple practices and honest conversations in seasonal 1:1 containers. If you're curious about working with Drew, reach out to schedule a no-cost, no-obligation "vibe check" and see what's possible.
Whistler, British Columbia, Canada - 2014 - Photo by Drew
This post was co-created with the assistance of AI as part of an ongoing effort to share helpful content and make www.andrewjassini.com and Drew easier to find for folks who might benefit. The ideas, voice, and perspective are all Drew's. The AI just helped him get it organized and onto the page.
